Episode 1 :
- Doudou...
- Darling, it’s time to be brave. Doudou’s dead !
- Oh no Doudou !
- I’m fucking sorry baby ! He’s dead right in front of me, killed by those motherfucking chicano nazis.
- Doudou !
- Yeah baby. He called me this morning, he wanted to see me in a bar downtown. He was really nervous, i could tell, but he didn’t say why.
- Oh doudou !
- I’m so sorry my dear. When I arrived, I saw those motherfuckers of chicanos nazis on their fucking bikes. They were leaving the place. I knew something has gone wrong.
And then i saw Doudou on the street, lying in his own blood.
- Doudou !
- Sorry baby ! He was still breathing. He tried to tell me something but i couldn’t understand. And then, he died. In my arms.
- Doudou !
- Doudou’s dead baby. He ‘s dead like a man fighting for justice and freedom, killed by some motherfucking nazi cowards.
And now baby, it’s time for revenge baby !
- Doudou !
- Yeah baby. Let’s kill all those motherfuckers of chicano nazis, let there be blood.
Episode 2 :
- Baby, i gotta talk to you !
- Doudou !
- Yeah baby, i know, i know he’s dead, it’s a fucking hard time for you and our family, and our community. Doudou was the best, we will miss him so much !
- Doudou !
- Baby, i really need to talk to you ! I found a letter of Doudou. I guess he put it in my jacket while he was in my arms, dying in his own blood, killed by those fucking chicano bikers of hell.
- Doudou !
- Yeah baby, i know it’s hard for you ! But listen to me. In this letter, he says, he was meeting the chicano nazis to get some dope. Some dope for you, baby !
Is that true baby ? Are you having a fucking drug issue ?
- Doudou !
- Oh my god ! I can’t believe this shit ! It’s fucking real isn’it ? How long have you been on drugs ?
- Doudou !
- Seven years ? You MEAN you’ve been using this shit fot 7 years and we’ve seen nothing ? Neither your mum or me ?
What’s happening to our family baby ? We used to be so close, why don’t you talk to us anymore baby ? You’ve grown so fast !
- Doudou !
- I know, it’s my fault baby, i‘m always outside, killing badguys, protecting our community and our country against chicanos and nazi bikers.
And now, i realize, i forgot my own family, i forgot you baby. I’m so sorry baby !
- Doudou !
- Yeah baby, from now on, i will never let you down, i promise i will always take care of you.
We need to get you a rehab, but fisrt, we need to kill all those motherfuckers of chicano nazis for selling drugs to the little kids on the streets. They will pay for what they did to you and Doudou.
- Doudou !
- Yeah together baby ! You and me, let’s blow those nazi scumbags !
Episode 3 : the drug cartel
- Baby i know it’s not the right time, yeah, i know, we’re at the funeral of Doudou but i really need to talk to you.
- Doudou !
- Yeah baby, i just received an anymous call from the President of United States.
He says he was sorry for the loss of Doudou.
He also said that you and Doudou were undercover agents for the CIA.
Is that true baby ?
- Doudou ?
- Okay baby, this shit is crazy shit but ok.
He told me that you and Doudou were about to get down a fucking nazi chinaco drug cartel selling drugs to little kids when Doudou was killed.
Do you think they understood that Doudou was a cop ?
- Doudou !
- Yeah baby, i agree. But let me think. Something’s wrong.
Why the letter in my pocket ? Why did Doudou try to convince me you were an addict if you were both CIA agents ?
- Doudou !
- Oh baby, can’t believe this shit, you must be right. Doudou was not Doudou. Doudou was a fucking double agent working for the nazi chicano bastards selling drugs to the little kids on the streets.
He tried to blow your cover. What a bloody fucking bastard ! If only I could kill him again.
But wait : if the murder of Doudou was a trap ?
- Doudou ?
- If it wasn’t the chicanos but CIA ? Maybe you’re next on the list baby ? Maybe they want to get rid of you two ?
Ok baby, we need to find you a safe place. But first, we need some fucking action. Let’s kill all these nazi chicano bikers. I hate those bastards selling drugs to the little kids on the streets. Yeah baby, let’s blow their fucking guts and make some « pâté de nazi » with their blood !
Epilogue :
Quand elle est venue me voir, elle m’a regardé et elle m’a dit : Doudou, toi et moi, on va faire exploser ce putain de cartel de chicano-nazis qui vendent de la drogue aux petits enfants dans les rues. Alors j’ai su deux choses : uno, j’allais dire oui, dos, ça serait ma perte.
Peut-être que si elle avait su mon vrai nom, elle ne m’aurait pas demandé ça. Je m’appelle Felippe Gustavo Rodriguez Montoya de Escobar. Je suis un pingou si, mais de sang hispanique.
Pour cette petite, j’ai tout accepté. J’ai subi toutes les humiliations, jusqu’à son crétin de padre qui me lavais le culo dans la baignoire dès qu’elle a le dos tourné. A moi, me laver le culo. Je suis un pingou, je suis né dans l’eau, j’ai grandi dans l’eau, je suis propre puta cabron.
Alors quand le cartel m’a proposé des petites dédomagements comme ils disaient, j’ai tout accepté, j’ai tout pris, l’argent, les putas, la drogue, todos. Je tenais ma vengeance.
Mais cette vengeance puérile était un poison acide qui me rongeait l’âme. Je me suis perdu. Et quand je me suis vu à travers ses yeux à elle, j’ai compris que j’étais devenu une mierda.
Alors il ne me restait plus qu’une solution : mourire. Ou plutôt disparaître.
Alors j’ai tout organisé, mon propre assassinat. Le puppet master, c’est moi, c’est moi qui tire les ficelles, los otros ne sont que des pantins ignares.
Alors peut-être que ton cerveau croit ce que disent les autres, que je suis un traître, que j’ai trahi ta confiance.
Mais tu corazon, lui il connaît la veridad. Mi amor, dans le fond de ton âme tu le sais, je t’ai toujours aimé et je t’aimerai toujours car je suis ton Pingou.
Je suis ton Doudou !
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